I’ve noticed recently there are some words I hear a lot that were not heard so much in previous years. 

Words like toxic and trauma.

I don’t think it’s healthy for us, or society, when we magnify or exaggerate life events. Unfortunately, social media has trained us to want extremes in life.

The reason I feel this is important, is because we create much of our life based on the words we use. We have a personal understanding of them. So even when the extreme experiences are not happening, our body/mind hears the extreme words from us and thinks those extremes are actually happening. And when you think it, or speak it over and over again, you believe it’s true. (known as Illusory Truth) Then we interpret our life from those excessive perspectives. 

I hear people using toxic randomly: toxic relationships, toxic masculinity, toxic people. Well, I don’t know about you, but I interpret “toxic” as really bad – poisonous – might even kill you. This interpretation would create an emotional wall between me and what I’d be describing. A separation. 🙁

Yes, there are dangers to look out for, to correct or even prepare for. But are they all really toxic? Or are they just unpleasant, non agreeable, or challenging?

When labeling someone as toxic, you might ask yourself: Am I projecting a quality of my own that I don’t like onto him? Look inside and see if there’s an opportunity to grow yourself. Maybe heal a long-standing pattern you have.

Exaggerating words like toxic don’t allow compassion or resilience to be part of any possible healing that could take place. 

Then there’s the word trauma. 

Yes, there are actual instances of trauma: the lasting emotional response that often results from living through a very distressing event. And I honor the suffering those people have endured. 

But I hear people way too often use “trauma” to describe situations that were unpleasant or really challenging. Maybe even awful, but not truly traumatic.

The problem with describing oneself as having had a trauma that was actually a difficult situation is that their empowerment is reduced and they stay a victim. But it can actually be an exercise in resilience to learn life lessons from the event. Resilience is an important trait to integrate as a powerful self-care tool. 

Lastly, when we use explosive negative words often, we are teaching our body/mind to feel threatened, whether we’re actually under threat or not. Creates too much adrenaline, weakening our health. Our capacity to feel safe and to think clearly is impaired. 

Our words are our affirmations.

Choose your words wisely. Others may not hear your thoughts, but your body does. And it is creating your life minute by minute, thought by thought.

Be clear. Be kind to yourself. Empower yourself. Others will benefit.

💝 Sending you blessings of joy and peace today,


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